LeaV

So, I'm a little bit excited about the movies coming out during the infamous Thanksgiving-Christmas release window.  I still need to see "The Deaths of Ian Stone".  For those of you who are not horror fanatics, this was released during the 8 Films To Die For promo by After Dark films.  They failed miserably last year with these indie films; however, this year there were a few promising entries including the "...Ian Stone" film and that captured my interest.  Fellow fanatics thought it was an interesting take, a new theme, not necessarily horror but more sci-fi chiller. 

Also, I am dying to see "Joe Strummer - The Future is Unwritten" which was directed by Julien Temple.  I loved that Temple redeemed himself and did "The Filth and the Fury," and it was almost melancholy and sad for me to watch John Lydon talk about Sid the way he did.  Anyway, I'm hoping he can capture that same essence with this film about Strummer.  The Clash have a very special place in my heart, buying all those bootlegs from overseas, being the only person I knew who knew the correct words to "Rock the Casbah," seeing the video for London Calling for the first time and deciding right then and there I wanted to be a punk, wanting to be involved in Class War.  A little bit of that rebel in me kind of died when Joe passed away in 2002. 

Plus, natch, I'm stoked to see Sweeney Todd...two favorites---gore and Johnny Depp (swoon).  And lastly, I NEED to see No Country for Old Men.  Yes, I really, really need to see "No Country for Old Men."  I hear it doesn't delve very far from the book, and I love movies that stray from convention.  Nothing neat and clean.  Genius Coen Brothers. 

So, every Christmas (or thereabouts), my sister and I along with my nephew like to check out a new movie on Christmas Day. We don't have many traditions.  There is no huge Christmas dinner or brunch or anything like that.  We don't attend any services or Mass.  We always say we're going to, but we never make it.  We're not the most motivated people in the world, but we do manage to hit a flick on Christmas Day.  Consider that our tradition; and considering that we're on the other side of normal, 99% of the time the movie is going to be some slasher/horror/gore fest picture.  Nothing like a little blood and guts on Christmas Day.  One year, however, we did see a Lord of the Rings movie.  I'm not sure which one---they all kind of blended together for me.  Not saying I didn't like the movie.  I do watch it again and again after the umpteenth time that my sister and nephew have to watch it again and again.  It is visually stunning.  It was just hard for me to pay attention, and I got so damn confused. 

Last year, we wanted to see Black Christmas, but the ethical elitists in this town sitting on their moral high horse of reason passing judgement on others refused to show it at our local theaters. 

This year, even if we have to travel out of town, we're going to see Alien versus Predator - Requiem. 

ANYWAY...All this movie going fun got me to thinking about movies released during the Thanksgiving - Christmas window---the majority seem to be a lot of slaser flicks (yeah for me); but I'm not all blood and guts.  So, I compiled a list of some of my other favorite movies released during the Thanksgiving - Christmas window.  Now, mind you, most of these picks are Christmas related, etc., but are not necessarily all Christmas movies or Christmas-themed movies.  These are movies released during the Thanksgiving - Christmas release window that happen to be some of my favorites.  And, I'm not saying that any of them are good, except for maybe a few.  Just stuff that makes me happy.  Got it?  Okay, here it is...

1. 
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (release date December 1, 1989).  You know, I end up watching this movie every year around this time, and it never gets old for me.  I love how goofy and silly it is, and there is actually a part in the movie that is a bit touching (when Clark is stuck up in the attic, and he's watching old home movies.  Yeah, it's sweet).  I get that way sometimes when I think about my crazy family.  All in all, I like this movie, because I love my family too.  No matter how much I want to strangle them and leave them somewhere in the desert at times.

2.  
Home Alone (release date November 16, 1990).  Again, I love this movie for the same reason I love Christmas Vacation.  Remember Macaulay Culkin that young?  Too cute. 

3.  
Jingle All the Way (release date November 22, 1996).  Yeah, so.  I liked this movie, even though it got a "Razzie" award in 1997.  It's the same reason why I liked the movie "Purple Rain," and still listen to Prince.  It was filmed entirely in Minnesota.  I recognize all the location shots.  Simple things amuse me.  That's all I have to say about this one, because I've already said too much.

4. 
Silent Night, Deadly Night (release date November 9, 1984).  Well, I'm a horror person.  Of course I'm going to put a horror movie or two on the list.  Okay, to best some up why I think this little gem is awesome, check out these quotes from the film...

Mother Superior: They thought they could do it without being caught. But when we do something naughty, we are always caught. Then, we are punished. Punishment is absolute, punishment is good.
Billy Chapman: Yes, Mother Superior.
Mother Superior: You left your room, William.
Billy Chapman: Yes, Mother Superior.
Mother Superior: Very, very naughty!

Grandpa: You see Santa Claus tonight you better run boy, you better run for ya life!

Grandpa: You scared, ain't ya? You should be! Christmas Eve is the scariest damn night of the year!

Okay, I gotta go and rent this movie right now.  I need to see this right now!

5. 
Less Than Zero (release date November 6, 1987).  I like the remake of "Hazy Shade of Winter" by the Bangles.  Eeesh.  I can play it on my guitar, maybe that's why.  But, Robert Downey playing a junkie?  Shocking.  What a stretch (life imitating art).  You know you were thinking that.  This movie always reminds me of why I hate everything the 1980s stood for (bad, bad, decade), and I need to remind myself of that every once in awhile.  So, I appreciate this movie for doing that for me.  Keanu Reeves was originally supposed to have Andrew McCarthy's role, apparently.  I don't even know why that's relevant.

6. 
Wolf Creek (release date December 25, 2005).  Psycho hillbilly in the outback.  Okay, true confession, I like these kind of horror movies; because the premise is not too far from any kind of actuality.  That's a little freaky.  Being afraid of a zombie or aliens or vampires is not an issue for me---being afraid of the psycho hillbilly down the street with a "mommy complex" scares the living shit out of me.

7.
Schindler's List (release date December 15, 1993).  I don't think I need to say anything.

8. 
The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (release date November 19, 2004).  I love cartoons and I love Spongebob, and me and my 3-year-old nephew have something to do together when I have to babysit.  Plus, I'm going to be pitching a treatment to Nickelodeon very, very soon I hope; and I want to say tons of nice things about them.

9. 
Mars Attacks! (release date December 13, 1996).  It's just weird and goofy and funny.  I've had dreams after wild nights in college that look like this movie.

10. 
Ace Ventura Pet Detective:  When Nature Calls (release date November 10, 1995). 

Ace: Friends, rodents, quadrupeds, lend me your rears!
[yodels]
I love animals, and I loved this movie.  Sorry.  That's just the way it is.

This lovely piece of work in my humble opinion I know just a little about.  I know it is entitled, "David with the Head of Goliath," which was finished around 1609-1610 by Caravaggio.  I've been a wee bit intrigued with his work because of the anguished life he supposedly lived and the sorrowful end to his life.  So, in the spirit of the latest assignment regarding the POV of someone inside the painting, I try to take on the persona of Caravaggio, as it has been said that the head of Goliath in this painting is assumed to represent Caravaggio himself.  There is a bit of a modern day twist on the reasons I believe he spiraled into such a despair and to why anyone of us could (aside from the presumed murder Caravaggio himself committed).  So, here it is...

"Demon"

I think of the day when I was the conqueror.  Grasping at fractured thoughts and memories, I think of how small I feel, how small I still feel.  When I was conqueror, I was master of my own destiny.  I could laugh and love and sing and dance.  Life was a party.  Life was to be lived; but I sit here now thinking about how small I feel, how small I still feel.  I could slay the giant.  I could slay the giant with a head tilt, wink, and a smile.  I could drown the giant in neon lights and

smoke-filled rooms with the soft drone of a jukebox playing some nondescript

song that I could never remember the next day.  I could slay the giant with some awkward moment back at his place or mine, if I could find it; but, morning always came; and there the giant was, still waiting, still gnawing at any sense of dignity I had left, at any sense of hope I had, at any sense of self-esteem I held.

So, here I sit with the giant, taunting me, laughing in my face.  He knows I can't touch him.  I'm shackled, chained, and bound; and he knows I have to face him and fight until one of us concedes.  And, I'm scared, because concession isn't just a bow and a handshake.  Concession is forever; to whatever place you believe in after you take your final gasp.  You're never coming back, and I have so much to do still.  So many things to say to so many people I've forgotten in the haze that was my shield.  Do I concede?  I feel so small.

Digging up memories that I thought were gone, he throws them at me one by one, slowly, and replays them over and over and over again until I who would not cry in his presence cannot stop the flood of tears and heaves of sorrow that overtake me until I'm forced to fall to the ground in shame and defeat.  I will never defeat him.

Red light halos shroud me in a loser’s glory.  It takes three days for me to finally slay the giant.  Three days to come face to face with the giant I thought only poisons could kill.  One day of nearly conceding, three days of artificiality to bring me back; and I sit here now feeling small but this time proud.  Did I slay the giant?  He is a headless demon, but his heart still beats as mine. 

The monkey (on my profile pic) I got awhile ago from my sister, as I'm pretty much obsessed with monkeys, seriously.  Sometimes, I think I'm a silly monkey.  I watch them for hours at the zoo and take loads of pictures of them, and then I laugh.  Monkeys are funny.  Greystoke...The Legend of Tarzan made me cry so hard, as did Gorillas in the Mist and King Kong.  My nephew is still upset that I will not watch the end of the remake of King Kong (the Peter Jackson remake) with him.  I just can't, because it turns me into a blubbering mess.  And, by the way, we call my nephew, "monkey."  I had a stuffed monkey in college with a Motley Crue bandana on him that some friends kidnapped from me.  Ransom notes and everything.  I was pretty badly scared.  It was a lovely reunion when I got him back.  My grandmother's spider monkey helped me to learn to walk...true story. 

I also adore most every creature in nature be it walk, crawl, slither, fly, or hop.  I love my dogs.  I love dogs in general.  I'm quite a know-it-all when it comes to anything doggy related.  Got a puppy problem?  Ask me.  I'll probably have a lot of advice.  I used to train dogs as a career a long time ago.  I also worked in a kennel (100 dogs to take care of over the July 4th weekend by myself was quite the adventure).  Cesar Milan "The Dog Whisperer" is one of my heroes.  I love his show and watch whenever I can.

I think goats, camels, llamas, and kangaroos are kick ass.  Any animal (except people, rude!) that spits at you when it's ticked off is pretty kick ass.

Most bugs and slithery-type critters don't even phase me.  I'll pick up anything and examine.  I love bees, but they don't like me.  I'm deathly allergic.  I have to have an Epi-Pen and everything in case I get stung.  I wanna snake but...

I have my rats.  Rats are the coolest pets to have if you can't have a puppy or kitty.  They're smart, too.  They'll learn their names, do tricks, recognize you as in their "ratty" pack.  If you hand tame them well, they'll never bite (unlike gerbils and hamsters, little buggers).  My ratty bites me sometimes, because I do stupid things like try to have her eat a strawberry out of my mouth.  She mistook my lip for part of the strawberry.  Oops.  I think she felt bad afterward. 

I love bats.  I can catch them pretty easily, but not if they're out in daylight.  I do worry about rabies, maybe.  They'd get into our house a lot during the summer.  I hate that people here try to kill them or think they're a nuisance.  They eat bad bugs like mosquitos and flies.  When they'd get into our office at work, everyone would come looking for either me or the janitor to get them out. 

I have a "spiritual" thing, if you could call it that, with wolves and dolphins but mostly wolves.  This sounds stupid, but I can't look a real wolf in the eye (like if I see them at a zoo or exhibit) without wanting to cry.  Same thing with dolphins.  I used to have tons of dreams when I was real little about wolves, not hurting me just being with me.  I collect anything wolf (or dog or dolphin) related.  I have some beautiful wolf pieces. 

I'm half Mexican, if that matters; but I barely speak any Mexican (sad).  My dad talks to me in Texican.  For the most part, I can understand him, but I always answer in English. 

I'm very long-winded, if you haven't noticed already.  I love the sound of my voice.  It's extremely deep, which is ironic considering I'm very small. 

 I have a very bad Napoleonic complex(does this only apply to short guys?), but I don't have an inferiority complex.  No, I don't have a Napoleonic complex; I can just be very domineering when I need to be.  In situations of leadership (like at work), I become drunk with power.  Well, I'm only human. 

Oh, my mom is the most awesome mom in the world.  I hate that she's sick.  If I had to leave a word of advice to young people, I'd say that if you can, if you are able, if you have opportunity---spend as much time with your parents as you can before it's too late.  I'm learning this the hard way, but I love the time we do get to spend together.  I talk to my mom on the phone every day practically.  She's eccentric (she rescues wayward basset hounds), but it's such a good eccentric.  She's also so bad ass with her seamstress, sewing, crocheting, artsy-fartsy, and cooking skills. 

I'm domestic.  I like to cook.  I love to clean the house.  I'm not ashamed to admit it.  I love taking care of people. 

That's too much information...but, if you do have doggy questions (pee-pee problems, chewing, and what not)---you can ask.  That's my way more than two pence worth.

Just some random facts I've collected (from various sources) over awhile with regard to the human body.  You may have heard of some.  Some may surprise you.  Either way, use it to amuse your friends---if they're easily amused.

1.  Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.    Good thing they have those self-adhesive stamps now.  I'd hate to gain 1/10 of a calorie licking a stamp.

2.  Every person has a unique tongue print.Imagine if that's how they booked you in jail instead of your fingers. 

3.  You shed 600,000 particles of skin every hour, 1.5 pounds a year; and by the age of 70, on average you have lost 105 pounds of skin.  Ewww.  That's all I've got to say about this, oh, and don't shed on me!

4.  Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.  Cheeky dolphins.

5.  All the chemicals in the human body combined average out to about $6.25.  So, when someone tells you you're not worth s**t, I guess they're right.

6.  If all 600 muscles in your body pulled in one direction, you could lift 75 tons.  All the muscles in the body, hmmm.

7.  Your thumb is the same length of your nose.    Go ahead, check it out.  I won't judge.

8.  It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown.  So, I'm not scowling because I'm surly; I'm just working out my mouth muscles. 

9.  Men without hair on their chests are more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men with hair.  Would this be because the men without hair on their chests feel less manly and therefore drink more?  Just wondering. 

10.  Your ears secrete more earwax when you are afraid than when you are not.  Can't be afraid of what you can't hear, like FOB (no, just kidding). 

ADDITION (I know, this makes it 11; but who cares).

1l.  Having a pet can add +7 years to your life...nuff said...

I'm in the process of deleting my account from myspace.  It's been a slow and laborious process for me, as well as mentally draining.  I have trouble letting go of things, so hence, the mental draining.  Anyway, I've brought some of my blogs from myspace over here to Buzznet and see below, there they are! 

1.  The Virgina Tech Tragedy...(April 21, 2007)

Well, it's been a week since the VA Tech tragedy.  Following this tragedy, there have already been two newsworthy threats in my little neck of the woods alone.  First, at the UofM where my sister attends school (a bomb threat in the building she has her classes in) and a supposed "hit list" and threats at my nephew's high school.  Additionally, the great town I live in had a murder during the daytime-noontime hour that is still, as of yet, unsolved.  This is just in my little neck of the woods. 

Horror is nothing compared to what goes on everyday in the world.  The real world is far more vicious and evil than any horror movie monster that any normal person could conjure up.  There are no plots; there are no characters; there is no clean and neat permanent ending.  There is just the random brutality that happens every day, every where with no rhyme or reason to it. 

So, I spend a lot of time in the world of horror; and despite everything, I spend my time in the real world trying to be a good person, trying to deflect the cruelty I hear and read about everyday by being hopeful regarding the innate goodness of man. 

No matter how much the news media will cover what happened at VA Tech, there will never be a logical explanation that any sane person will understand.  Suffice it to say, this guy was EVIL; and he carried out his evil plan and now is dead and gone.  So, let's stop giving him the media attention he more than likely wanted.  Let's keep believing in the good in the world and the compassion of the human spirit.  Let's offer our prayers and thoughts to those that now have to deal with these tremendous voids in their lives and continue to believe that collectively our compassion and belief in our fellow man will continue to squash the evil that wanders around everyday, in every town, on every block.

2.  Rambling...(April 7, 2007)

When I was growing up, there seemed to be an abundance of stories on the news regarding the Bermuda Triangle.  I think there were even television shows made about planes full of people disappearing in the Bermuda Triangle.  Oh, and quicksand.  People always seemed to find quicksand and disappear forever under the earth.  Yeah, that scared me.  Even though I lived in Milwaukee, I was afraid I'd disappear into the Bermuda Triangle.  You know, just walking to school one day and boom! I'd be swallowed up by the Bermuda Triangle.  But, if that didn't happen, I'd fall into a pile of quicksand on the sidewalk.  Geez, and don't get me started about what would happen after the triangle sucked me up or the quicksand sucked me down.  Would I just suffocate and die?  Would I meet Neptune!  Would I meet the devil?  Would there be monsters or zombies, and would they want to tear my flesh off my bones?  Geez, I think I just re-scared myself.

3. ????.... Mind you, my personal views and viewpoints have change drastically since I ranted here. So, please don't hate. I'm a good person ( : (March 25, 2006)

Just want to elaborate on my "subject" posted.  I've had an idea in mind for awhile now about creating a "story, screenplay, etc" about this idea.  I dropped it, because I felt it was mean-spirited and cruel.  Besides, I know some real stupid people, and I actually like them.  Anyway, I was watching a Montel Williams show the other day (nothing else was on, believe me), and Montel is going to have a nice sit-down chat discussion with his audience and certain all-knowing media types about the state of the United States today--an objective, roundtable forum discussing the war in Iraq, hurricane Katrina, everybody's rights, prescription drugs etc., etc., etc.  So, I figure okay, this ought to be interesting.  Prepare to enlighten me, right?
Five minutes into the show, I realized this was not an open, objective discussion; this was an hour devoted to people pissing and moaning about how much they hate President Bush.  Fine, fair enough, we get it...you hate the president.  I may not agree with your views, and I sure know that none of you agree with mine; but I'm willing to listen.  I want to listen.  I want to know why, oh why, do you disagree so much with EVERYTHING the president does.  I figure if I have more than just one viewpoint to base my own decisions on, it gives me that much better of a shot of making an "informed" decision, right? 

So...what is so bothering me about this show???????  It can't be just the piss-and-moan factor.  And then it hits me, what bothers me is the fact that about 99 percent (okay, maybe that's a high number, but I was too busy to take a damn "nonscientific" poll) of the comments out of these audience members' mouths were just plain IDIOTIC.  For brevity, I bring forth two mental giant musings from Montel's "special" audience...

1.  The president knew two days before Katrina hit that this was going to be a catastrophic event; yet, he did nothing to load up those people on all those schoolbuses to evacuate the area.
2.  During 9/11, the president got on his plane and just flew around to avoid his responsibilities.

Yes, I know, these comments really came out of the mouths of real, live adult human beings.  Are you amazed that they lived this long without accidentally running themselves over with their own cars?  First of all, to follow up on these beacons of bright light...

1. Then, I assume Ray Nagin also knew two days ahead of time that a hurricane of catastrophic proportions was about to hit the town he mayors, right?  Where was Ray?  Why wasn't Ray loading these people up as well?  Oh, wait, he was mapping out how he was going to finally get to create his "chocolate" city.  Okay.  I get it.

2.  "Doomsday Plane."   Ever heard of that?  Okay probably not.  How about the E-4B National Airborne Operations Center or TCAMO" (Take Charge And Move Out) or the "Nightwatch" or "NEACP" (pronounced "Knee Cap" for National Emergency Airborne Command Post).  Essentially in times of a national emergency (such as 9/11), we do need to keep our president and other government leaders alive so as to continue to run the country, k?  The primary purpose of the plane is to provide a safe and livable platform for the President, Secretary of Defense and Chairman of the Joint Chiefs to use as a mobile command post.  I believe the President was on Air Force One, but that is beside the point.  The president was not running away to avoid his responsibilities IDIOT.  They needed to keep him out of harm's way so he could keep presidentin' DUH!  Do you want to do it?  I don't.  I'm in my basement with my dogs planning on who I'm going to have to kill to get food when the world ends; and I'm praying that someone (um, like the president and his staff) are trying to figure out what our next move will be as a country so that I don't have to kill my neighbor for food (and a sweet big screen TV--no, I wouldn't do that maybe).

Okay, so back to my original idea.  I have decided to go ahead and begin my story idea again.  Thank you Montel.

That's all I wanted to bring over.  I'm deleting my Myspace account tomorrow.  Bon voyage myspace---it's been pseudo-real.

The second part of the photo poems...two photos taken by me at Werribee Park in Melbourne, VIC;and the other photo is of my little rat Peanut...

Photo Poetry (the second series, "If I Could Talk to the Animals")...

I cannot take really great pictures.  I wish I could.  I took a class in college in photography...but I've forgotten most of it already.  I took a lot of classes in college in writing.  So, I took these photos (two from Werribee Park in Melbourne, VIC; and one in the Wisconsin Dells while I was enjoying a game of mini-golf).  I put little thoughts on them and then decide it's photo poetry.  One day, I'll be brave enough to post some of my actual published work (my writings) and some of the unpublished stuff.  Just as I was almost brave enough today to post half of my face. 

Photo Poetry (the first series, "If I Could Talk to the Animals")...

(((DISCLAIMER...I am not making light of the situation that this couple found themselves in, and I am happy that this story had an eventual happy ending.  I wish the Perry family many happy years together; and this is just a journal entry, nothing more...)))

Fox News is currently running a story regarding a 40-year-old man who returned home after having dinner with friends, went to bed, and then physiologically died that night.  His apparent cause of death was acute coronary arrest, which according to Fox's story, seems to strike relatively healthy middle-aged gentleman (although, I wouldn't consider 40 years old as middle-aged). 

When paramedics arrived, they supposedly told his wife that he was dead; and at the hospital, an MRI of the brain was done (as this gentleman had not received oxygen to his brain for a full 7 minutes...in layman's terms, not good) which revealed on the brain imaging only white which correlates with absolutely NO cellular activity.  Again, in layman's terms, you're DEAD!

Apparently, he was on some type of assisted life support for three weeks.  His wife refused to follow the sage advice of a neurologist who told her it would be best to just pull the plug, as he was dead anyhow; and thanks to his wife in essence "firing" the neurologist who told her to pull the plug, this gentleman woke up one day...and told his wife she was beautiful, I guess (sigh).

The gentleman is still alive today.  He's walking, talking, and apparently just as mentally sharp.  Considering his brain lacked oxygen for a full 7 minutes, his speech is delayed and a bit labored; but, he will be undergoing physical therapy to assist with that.

The point here...if you go to bed and die and then three weeks later wake up...that makes you a zombie and, hence the title of this journal, proof positive that zombies of this type do exist.

Okay, with some of the shenanigans that have been going on here lately, I wanted to make this blog a little more light-hearted.  I'll get back on my soapbox after this, but bear with me on this one, okay?  For the life of me, I cannot figure out what I find so attractive in these following older gentlemen.  Whoa, hold on, I'm not saying their hideous or freaks of nature; I'm just saying that they are a bit older than one would expect for a sex symbol (and, yes, there are older gentleman and ladies who are older and are considered sex symbols like George Clooney and what not, but those people are just freaks of nature and anomolies) and not what you would typically consider "sexy."  So, am I making any sense?  I just find it odd that I find these guys attractive.  From the people I've thrown this out to, just casually, they usually give me that, "so, you've finally cracked from the pressure," look.  So, what do you guys think?  Am I seriously off my nut or not?  Remember, this is just for fun.  Add your own if you think you should.

So, here they are:

***The gentleman of Law and Order:  Criminal Intent and SVU***

Vincent D'Onofrio - He just turned 48.  I loved him in Full Metal Jacket.  Even as he gets older and a little pudgier, I still love watching him.  Maybe, it's his odd mannerisms or his voice.  I don't know.  Hell, I even liked him in The Cell and Men in Black.  Could it be that he's from Brooklyn.  I like me them New Yorkers!

Christopher Meloni - Okay, he's only 46.  What?  He's 46? I think I like that he looks like he could take care of business.  That doesn't make any sense.  Never mind.  Moving on. 

Chris Noth - I love this guy.  Not only do I love that he was born in Madison, Wisconsin, (hey, he's a cheesehead by default), I also love that one of his first movie roles was in Smithereens playing a prostitute.  I really loved that movie.  It also had Richard Hell in it!  Oh, and did I mention that the dapper Mr. Noth will be turning 53 next week.  Wow!

***Some other actors, politicians, directors that I find attractive***

Hugh Laurie - Yeah, he plays Dr. House on House.  I'm completely addicted to that show.  Remember, I do like things medical.  I think what I like is the character he plays which makes him seem rather attractive to me.  Arrogant, cocky, rude, and off the chart smart.  Boy, oh, boy---that gets me all the time.  Mr. Laurie actually started out in comedy, by the way; and for those of you who didn't know, he's British with a nice, British accent.  Mr. Laurie is 48 years old.

Barack Obama - Well, Sen. Obama is 46 years old; and I swear in this picture.  Well, I just don't know.  Isn't that great, big, ole smile adorable, though?  I don't think I could take him seriously, however, if he did happen to become our next president because of his boyish good looks.  I'd be like, "Awww, look at the pwesident.  Isn't he cuteee signing bills and all."

Mark Ruffalo- Well,  he's only 40.  That's not really that old at all.  He's still pretty young; but you must admit, he has a rather "different" look.  I love his voice, too.  He's also from Wisconsin (Kenosha).  It must be something in the cheese.

Robert Rodriguez - He's only 39, but he's Tejano and bad-ass.  I want to represent for my peeps down in Tejas.  Sorry about that.  Back to the show...He's a cool director that one day I aspire to be somewhat like, but I love he's sort of got that rock-and-roll persona.  Yes, I do find that somewhat attractive.

Nikki Sixx - Well, I know a lot of people might say this isn't an odd choice at all.  I still think he looks so good, and he's going to be freakin' 49 years old.  Can you believe that?  I find it so incredibly attractive that this guy lived and practically died in his hey-day and now looks better than ever.  I think he's a zombie, but I like zombies; so, no problem.

Oh, this one don't count.  This is Ville Valo from HIM (duh!).  He'll be turning 31 on Thanksgiving, so he's still just a baby by all accounts; but he is...well...geez....perfect, I guess.  I'm being a stupid fangirl, so never mind.

So, there you have it.  Maybe, I have some sort of daddy issues.  Please comment and add if you'd like. Just be nice.  It took a lot for me to admit this, and I'm sharing it with all of you, my fellow Buzznetters.

I live in an absolutely great state.  Seriously, I love it here in Minnesota.  I also live in a section of Minnesota dubiously titled "Med City."  I never in my wildest dreams as a young rebel listening to the Sex Pistols and the Clash and shouting "Anarchy" whenever the opportunity presented itself would imagine that access to stellar healthcare would be a decision in my choice of where to live.  However, not only did this influence my decision, I also became a part of the healthcare industry.  So, aside from my love of music and horror movies, I also add a love of medically-related things.  How random is that?

So, I listen to the news and hear that my great state no longer holds the distinction of being the healthiest state in America.  What?  The state where one of the most widely recognized and esteemed healthcare facilities calls home? 

Apparently, in the 2007 study of America's health rankings, there was a decline overall in the health of the entire nation, and this was in spite of supposed progress made in several key health indicators.  This report was submitted by the United Health Foundation, the American Public Health Association, and the Partnership for Prevention.

So, before I offer a wee bit of advice for our decline and how we can become healthier again (and this applies to all states), let me offer a few more startling statistics.  First of all, Minnesota is now No. 2 in the rankings overshadowed by Vermont and followed by Hawaii.  The least healthiest states are Mississippi, Louisiana, and Arkansas.  Although reduction in rates of cancer and cardiovascular mortality has occurred, it is overshadowed by increases in obesity, more uninsured Americans, and risky health behaviors.  Further, in the last six years, our health as a populous has "stagnated."  Citing said report, increases in obesity (from 11.6% in 1990 to 25% today, roughly 55 million Americans classified as obese) and a "persistent lack of progress in key health measures," such as smoking, violent crime, and children in poverty have contributed to our stagnation. 

I'm doing my part to try to get Minnesota back to the No. 1 slot and trying to become a healthier American.  I do have a wonderful gym membership, and I am now going.  I must admit, I do smoke; but I'm working on that as well (baby steps, please.  I'm not perfect).  I do not, however, ever smoke at work.  That is weird, because sometimes my work shifts are very long; and not once do I crave nicotine.  So, why don't I just quit if I can go that long?  Well, going without for 12 hours as opposed to FOREVER is a big step, give me some time.  The other thing that helps is that where I work is pretty much a smoke-free zone, of course, it's a medical facility.  One of the other major reasons, as well, is the fact that it does not promote a healthy image to the patients who visit our facility.  You don't want to see the physician who is going to treat you and tell you what you need to do to become healthier smoking a ciggie outside.  I'm all for these reasons.  I wholly support the logic.  Plus, you can get into a smite bit of trouble as an employee if you are caught smoking on the grounds (that might be the biggest reason I have, sorry). 

So, let's go one step further in this logic.  We all know the concerns regarding the high rates of obesity in our country today. Additionally, obesity (as well as the risky behavior of smoking) is associated with a poor quality of life, chronic disease, compromised productivity in the workplace, and with an escalation in healthcare costs related to managing chronic illnesses.  So, I propose that if you ban smoking in the workplace to promote wellness which in turn could decrease the rate of chronic illness and the costs associated with lost work time, decreased productivity, etc., you should also ban junk food.  There, I said it.  I know we don't want people telling us how to live our lives (especially our employers), and we shouldn't have government stepping in to try to manage ALL of our societal problems; but I'm not saying you couldn't have that Twinkie when you got home; and if you don't want to go to a gym or try to quit smoking or what not---then don't.  Live your life the way you want.  However, when I go to work, and I hear about fellow employees asking for a separate coat room for the smokers because of the smell and secondhand smoke; I just need to say something as well.  Okay, yes, I agree with you the smell is bad; and I'll put my coat in a separate coat room for you.  I'm respectful like that.  I'm not lighting up around you and blowing it in your face, so I don't think you need to worry about secondhand smoke (and I am aware of the risks involved in secondhand smoke, don't preach to me about it.  I get it).  But, please, don't tell me how unhealthy my behavior is when you weigh like 300 pounds and then become incensed when I mention that maybe that piece of cake the size of Rhode Island wouldn't be the best dietary choice for you.  If employers want healthy employees and to promote healthy habits, get rid of the crap you have in your vending machines and that you serve in your cafeterias; and if you do adopt healthier foods, lower the costs.  Why is it that I can go to McDonald's and pretty much order half the menu for $10, yet if I go somewhere nice to have a good, healthy meal I'm practically spending half my paycheck for one dinner?  Believe me, the costs you'll save in insurance, etc., will more than make up for the costs you invest in better food choices. I can't tell you how many times I've gone into the cafeteria and watched other emplyoees in there whose weight could be classifed in the obese to morbidly obese range eating crappy food and in extremely large portions.  So, then, why do these same employees grump about how unhealthy my habit is and I should quit and I'm going to get cancer and give everybody else cancer; but yet, find nothing wrong with their extremely unhealthy and equally risky behaviors.  Let's help them along like you were able to help me (by banning smoking) and ban the junk food!

And for America, why do you wonder why the proportion of Americans that potentially fall into the obese range are mostly poor?  Well, junk food is cheap, healthy foods are not.  Gym memberships are not cheap.  Insurance is not cheap.  Just something to think about.  Whoa, this is long.

That's my two pence worth.  I'm outta here...

So, my ongoing battle with my allegiance to the Minnesota Vikings football team I thought was going to end in another frustrating afternoon of why's? and how come's? and feeling like a loser for the rest of the evening, because I support such a losing team; and waiting to hear one more "maybe, next year" comment from a supportive Packer backer (bastards). 

A returned missed field goal in the first half by cornerback Antonio Cromartie from the Chargers didn't help either.  Oh, look were in the record books.  This is the longest play in NFL history.  God damned Cromartie returning our screw up for 109 yards for a touchdown.  This was not going to be a very pleasant day.

However, have the Gods of the Losers looked down upon us today and lifted our curse for one afternoon.  Is this in the form of rookie running back Adrian Peterson?  In only his eighth game, Peterson managed to set a rushing record of 296 yards on 30 carries.  And....we won!  We actually beat the Chargers 35-17.  Oh, rejoice!

So, I called up fellow buzznetter "lotrnerd" to share in this victory, as we both are fellow dejected Viking followers; and what's the first thing out of her mouth?????  "Well, we'll never get into the playoffs with our record."  Ugh!  Can we not bask in the glory before reality yanks us back into our pathetic states?  Buzzkill, buzznetter.  Can we not share in a few wonderful moments of victory before realizing our inevitable fate ("maybe, next year)?  Why, oh why, take away this little tiny piece of happiness from me immediately.  Postpone it for a moment.  Prolong the agony.  I can take it.  Let me have this one, stinking, tiny moment of glory.  Oh, but NOOOO, have to bring up right away

So, because of this, I bestow upon lotrnerd the dubious honor of being the first member inducted into the "Downer of the Month" club.