LeaV

Suck up the juices life offers you.  Turn no morsel away. 
Listen with your eyes wide open.
Grab a hand and run until your chest is heaving.
Leave your safety with your feet in slippers.
Fight venom with philosophy.
Touch a viper and smile.
Smile. Smile. Smile.

Cry when you are elated.
Laugh when there's nothing left to do.
Drink when your heart is on empty.
Sleep and dream and sleep and dream and sleep and dream!

To All...In Cyberspace...In Your Life...In Imagination...In Reality
Time is too short to sweat the small stuff.  A peaceful, contemplative, content, engaging, accomplished, and happy 2008.  I'll speak with you all soon...maybe next year ( :

(Caution...Could be Spoilers)

First of all, I'd like to say that I hope all of my buzznet buddies had a wonderful holiday and are slowly but happily making the adjustment back into everyday normal routine successfully until the next holiday right around the corner.  My holiday would have been merrier,  however, had I not seen this horrible movie.  Read on if you must.

I’m a glutton for punishment.  I say things that I regret later and never learn a lesson from it.  I take on way too many ridiculous tasks and sacrifice precious sleep to accomplish said ridiculous tasks.  I agree to babysit toddlers.  So, it was in line that I would subject myself to the most grueling 90 minutes or so of cinematic sludge ever in my life by going to see "Alien Vs Predator – Requiem."

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I can sit through a bad horror movie.  I am a huge fan of the genre and have seen enough bad horror movies to not let one more awful attempt at the genre bother me too much.  However, what sets this movie apart from the rest of the awful horror crap floating out there is the blatant laziness of this movie.

In my mind, this movie had 5 fatal flaws that led to me saying at its conclusion, “Wow, that was crap on a crap cracker.”  To save you the trouble, I will briefly outline these said flaws; and if you are a potential movie maker of horror, try to avoid these blatant boneheaded mistakes in your own movie, lest you suffer scathing online reviews by reclusive shut-in’s like myself.  So, here they are, the fatal flaws…

1.        Overuse of the high-angle shot (also known as the bird’s eye or God’s eye view shot).  To most casual moviegoers, this probably goes unnoticed.  To me, however, proper use of camera angles, shots, framing, etc., can be the difference between my establishing a connection with the characters and their dilemma or not caring whether or not they end up as some alien propagation pod.  After I stopped counting, I believe this movie subjected me to at least eight or nine high-angle shots.  I believe what this also does in this film and does so horribly considering this is a horror movie is portrays the characters from our perspective as very little and insignificant and having no control or power over the fate that awaits them.  Understandably, this can and is an overlying theme in most horror genres and the fear it invokes in the viewer of having death “get ‘ya” at anytime.  However, you have to have a developed character in order for the audience to relate to what they are going through and take on that persona themselves and instill that sense of fear in the audience which can then translate into a pretty darn good horror movie, and this movie…well, fails miserably.

2.        Blatant ripping off of the original Alien movie but not even being clever about it and underdeveloped story and characterization.  Sure, horror movies rip off concepts and ideas from other horror movies.  I mean just look at the whole influx of remakes of Japanese horror that bombarded the American horror movie market as of late (The Ring, The Grudge, the upcoming One Missed Call, etc.).  However, the female lead character in this film Kelly is a soldier (who by the way can’t even get a ride home from her tour of duty by her family and instead has to take a taxi home).  Well, now, the female lead in Alien played so awesomely by Sigourney Weaver was warrant officer Ellen Ripley (another strong female soldier type).  Additionally, another of the characters whom I believe was a male lead was an ex-con named Dallas.  The captain of the Nostromo (the ship in Alien) was named A.J. Dallas.  Aw, come on now!  At least get some different character names.  Furthermore, who were all these people in this movie?  At first, I’m trying to garner some sympathy for the hunter and his son in the beginning of the film and then here comes a crying waitress and then a woman aimlessly wandering the streets handing out flyers of her missing family.  Wait!  Stop!  What are their stories?  What’s the deal with unsure ethnicity cop and his relationship with ex-con Dallas, and why does he let ex-con Dallas in on all of his policing duties?  Who is this teenage boy working at the pizza parlor?  Well, I guess he has bullies, because they just pounded him into the pavement for some unknown reason.  Who are all these people and what are their stories?  Okay, you know what, I just don’t care anymore. 

3.       Lack of creativity.  If you’ve ever seen the movie Scream, I hate to admit it, but there are certain “rules” in horror movies that everyone doesn’t seem to follow which leads to their ultimate demise.  This seems to be a kind of joke right now for me in horror movies.  As of late, I don’t see any obvious and blatant use of it in today’s horror movies, unless it’s done a bit tongue in cheek.  This movie, however, used these played out themes; and it wasn’t even done tongue in cheek.  Seriously, you’ve just killed all the suspense you were trying to build up by putting these ridiculous situations in your movie that obviously everyone knows about.  For example, you know if you lean against the huge plate glass window at night and say,”Why, gee whiz, there’s no monsters out there,” you’re going to have a giant pissed off alien grab you and suck the stupid right out of you.  If you must investigate (or for heaven’s sake live in) a creepy sewer, you know that’s the first place the aliens are going to hide out in; and you're going to die for being a sewer sleuth or sewer dweller.  Of course, you’re going to meet your maker when you investigate any strange noises or flaming fireballs that happen to land in your vastly forested area.  And have we learned nothing from 28 Days Later????  If you happen to notice an army of frantic rats racing past you in said creepy sewer, trouble is a brewin’ just around the corner.  Furthermore, if your dog freaks out for no reason and starts barking incessantly and feverishly at what seems to be nothing, get the hell out of there.  Again, trouble is a brewin’.  Of course, I knew all this was going to happen, and I didn't care for the characters and no suspense was built up.  I just wanted to, at this point, see the special effects.

4.       Stupid foreshadowing.  I love the use of the foreshadow in story and plot development.  When done effectively, it leads to brilliance.  Case in point, M. Night Shyamalan’s use of the foreshadow in the film The Sixth Sense.  When used ineffectively, well, it’s just stupid.  You want a clue as to what’s about to happen.  It builds suspense and tension in the horror film and draws the viewer in to the story.  When you just outright tell the viewer what’s going to happen, well, it’s just stupid.  When a character in this movie says, “I’ll see you tomorrow,” I know he’s toast; so, kill him already.  When a character replies to the statement, “The National Guard will be here soon enough,” to which another character replies, “Not soon enough;” well, now I know everyone’s toast.  When a character says, “The government does not lie to us;” well, you know somehow the government is going to screw everyone.  Take the extra time to learn how to effectively use the foreshadow to build suspense.  Go watch The Sixth Sense or The Omen.  Do your homework next time and don't be lazy.

5.       Cruel shock value to make up for lack of creativity.  I see this ploy being used more frequently in horror today, and I don’t understand the rationale for it.  I like a good gore fest every now and then.  It's like an adrenaline rush like riding that monster roller coaster at the amusement park.  You put people in ridiculous situations, add an interesting story element, mix in some zombies or monsters, add lots of well-done special effects and gore; and it can be quite an amusing and thrilling little horror film delight.  Some of my favorite horror movies went overkill on the blood effects, but they were amusing and, as I said, ridiculous situations.  For example, one of my all time favorite series of movies, Evil Dead, is so effective in its use of gore.  It’s just so laughable and done so well, you know it’s not taking itself too seriously.  Peter Jackson’s foray into horror with the film Dead Alive was so ridiculous that I absolutely loved that film after I saw it and it’s overload on the gore element.  Watch it once or twice or hundreds of times like I have.  You’ll see what I mean.  One of my current favorites is a little gem called Zombie Honeymoon.  It’s a love story (chuckle, chuckle) and also a great little film.  What I do dislike, however, is the use of shocking situations in a horror film just to make the audience jump, because you couldn’t come up with a decent, developed story.  I believe this is why I’m not a big fan of Eli Roth’s work as a director.  I know he's one of the up and comers in the genre; but to me personally, I think he just relies too much on shock value to get a rise out of the audience.  Granted, however, he does have some interesting stories to tell---just not developed enough.  This movie, however, crosses the line.  I’m just going to say pregnant women and babies.  I’m not even going to go into details.  Nothing is shown, however, which probably saved the rating for this piece of crap.

So, there you have it.  Not only is this a review of the movie "Alien Vs Predator - Requiem," it's also a primer on what not to do in a horror movie if you want to do horror effectively.  My little gift to all you would-be horror writers and directors, so to speak.  Since, however, I'm a nice person, I do want to say something nice about this movie.  Um, the visual effects were pretty cool.  I like the predators.  They look like heavy metal guys. 

Well, time to get in the spirit and answer some Christmas questions.  Guess I've been tagged by John (lexidiem).  So, in the spirit of the holidays...mush forward...

1.  Wrapping paper or gift bags?  Well, I usually have my presents wrapped right at the store so I don't have to do it myself, because I'm lazy and a horrible, horrible wrapper.

2.  Tree; Real or Artificial?  It's artificial for me.  I have too many pets and too little time for a real tree.  My tree right now is white and silver.

3.  When do you put the Christmas tree up?  Probably about a week or so after Thanksgiving.

4.  When do you take the tree down?  Probably about a week or so after New Year's Day.

5.  Like eggnog?  No, yuck.

6.  Do you have a nativity scene?  I have a snowglobe with a nativity scene in it.  Does that count?

7.  Favorite gift received as a child?  Hmmm...probably a box of hand-made barbie doll clothes that my mom made.  I loved my barbies and having this many new barbie clothes was rad!

8.  Hardest person to buy for?  Right now, my 16-year-old nephew who lives with me.  Typical conversation, "So, what do you want for Christmas?"  "I dunno."  "Do you like clothes or maybe a new game?"  "Yeah, whatever."  I usually just give him money.  Sad.

9.  Easiest person to buy for?  My 3-year-old nephew.  Cars and candy and anything with Spongebob.  Toddlers are so easy.

10.  Worst Christmas gift?  Well, if anyone gives me something, no matter how awful, I still love it.  I keep everything.  I got a bag of plastic animals once from a one of my nephews so we could both play with them together.  I think the worst, however, was an engagement ring from an ex-boyfriend who promptly broke up with me a few months later. 

11.  Mail or e-mail a Christmas card?  Neither. I'm not very good about sending out cards.  I usually call people and then say, uh, sorry I didn't send you a card.

12.  Favorite Christmas movie?  Hands down...How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the Seuss cartoon original...not the Jim Carey remake).  I can quote that movie word for word and sing along to all the songs.

13.  When do you start shopping for Christmas?  If there isn't any hot ticket items that I need to get (this year, it was the game Rockband...already have it by the way), I shop on Christmas Eve.  I like the last minute feel of it, a lot of stuff is marked down, I can still find cool gifts for everyone, not a lot of people out and about---it's just really cool for me.

14.  Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?  I don't think so.

15.  Favorite food to eat on Christmas?  Cookies.  I bake like a fiend (John (lexidiem), would you like some cookies?)  I love my Christmas cookies.

16.  Clear or colored tree lights?  Doesn't matter.  As long as they're sparkly and pretty.

17.  Favorite Christmas Song?  "Silent Night" or "Joy to the World."  I love both of them, but my favorite to be honest is Schubert's "Ave Maria", sung by Mr. Luciano Pavarotti.

18.  Travel during Christmas or stay home?  I'm a home body.  I will travel out of town for Christmas if a movie I want to see on Christmas isn't playing in town.

19.  Store bought or homemade gifts?  I love homemade gifts.  I honestly do.  The thought that goes into someone actually making me a gift really humbles me.  I sometimes do homemade gifts, like a pretty tin filled with Christmas cookies and candies that I've made.  I'm not very crafty though.

20.  Angel or Star on tree top?  We have a homemade angel on the top of the tree.

21.  Open presents on Christmas Day or Christmas Eve?  Depends on what we're doing.  We usually open on Christmas Eve, however, because of everyone's schedules, we'll be opening Christmas Day this year.

22.  Most annoying thing about this time of year?  Snow.  I HATE snow.  And cold.  I HATE cold.  I don't care how pretty it is for Christmas, I hate freaking snow.  I have to shovel it, drive in it, be cold in it.  I hate it.

23.  Bake at  home or Buy?  Bake, bake, bake.  It's the only time, really, that I really get to cook and bake.  It's so gratifying and fun.

24.  Lights outside?  No, we're too lazy for that.  Plus, it's cold outside to put them up.  See #22. 

25.  Mistletoe?  No, my dogs would eat it if it fell down, and it could kill them.  I try to avoid it if I'm anywhere else.  Icky other people germs ( :

This was actually kind of fun; so, I'm going to tag (unless you've been tagged already), alisonchrista, kassady, allyn, fobrawsum, pompasaurus, and ravenblackhardt.  I'm going to tag seb as well (even though he's not on my friends list..YET).  So, have fun everyone.  Get in your happy place and post these questions and your answers in a journal.  I'll be reading and reporting back to Santa...me and hims is on the ins.

Happy Holidays...

Lea ( :

What is my wish?  Well, I guess it’s more of a goal than a wish, but I wish my goal would come true.  So, yeah, it is my wish.  My wish is to become a screenwriter (blaaa……).  I know,you may be picturing an annoying salesclerk or waiter or what not out in Hollywood pitching their work to anyone who will listen.  Yup, that’s me, except I don’t live in Hollywood…yet.  And believe me, I know how extremely difficult it is to break into this business of screenwriting; but I believe that persistence pays off, and I will keep pitching all of my work to as many agents as I can and promoting my work ad nauseum to as many agents as I can until someone asks to see one of my scripts…and it's pitched to a producer or an assistant…and another pitch…and another pitch to a studio…and then, wait, wait, wait…and then more pitching…and then a contract offer as a freelancer…and then the Oscar nod…(nothing too lofty).

I’m also willing to do rewrites.  I wouldn’t be ashamed to work in television.  My ego is in check.  I understand Hollywood’s formulaic insistence on regurgitated pablum; but I’m willing to forgo my principles just to get my foot in the door.  I’m willing to work stock.  We all have to start somewhere, and I believe I’ll start at the very bottom J. 

My other wish along these same lines is to become a cartoon writer, not comic book cartoons or comic strips, but cartoon live action writing.  This is a

much loftier and practically insane goal to have.  Most cartoons are written by staff writers, and there is not really much of a market for any original material.  So, without any true connections at the moment in live action animation (although I'm looking at trying to get in with the Animation Writer's Caucus; however, their affiliation is with the Writer's Guild---oooh,crap), the original material that I will attempt to market if I do have the opportunity to pitch and present has to be beyond spectacular (again, nothing too lofty).

I'd really like a shot at Williams Street (this was formerly Ghost Planet Industries.  Anyone remember Space Ghost).  Williams Street is a division of Cartoon Network which is owned by Turner Broadcasting.  I'd love to work with Adult Swim.  However, most of my writing toward animation falls on the level of the "Spongebob Squarepants" variety.  I’m not overly adult-oriented with my animation writing and original story ideas, but I use enough big words to go above the heads of most 3-year-olds.   

So, why cartoon writing?  Well, I had a professor in college once tell me to write about what I know.  Okay, do I live in the world of cartoons?  How can I write for cartoons if I don't know about living like a sponge (as in Spongebob)?  I believe that the advice is not meant to be taken completely literal.  If you write horror, are you intimately familiar with a host of deranged monsters and killers?  No, duh, and I hope not.  It's like what Tobe Hooper said with regard to the original idea for The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  He had mentioned in interviews that he got the idea while he was standing in a crowded store in the hardware section and was trying to figure out a way to get out and spotted the chainsaws.  Well, you get the idea from there.  I happen to draw a lot of my inspiration from watching my dogs interact with each other.  Animals make me laugh, and they make me laugh more when I make up little scenarios in my head that I believe they are engaging in (I think the technical term for this is anthropomorphism). 

I also draw the bulk of my cartoon ideas from my 3-year-old nephew.  So, here is a little treat for you all.  I'm going to show you in a few separate journals how my typical day plays out and how ideas for stories and cartoons just fall into my lap while I spend the day with my nephew, my rats, and my dogs.  So, without further adieu, the beginning of my day...

This is my home office.  This is where I start my workday, everyday after moving from my bed, to the bathroom, to the kitchen for coffee, outside with the dogs, back to the bathroom, and then in my home office.

Seriously, this is my home office.  The three different computers represent the three different things I do everyday for my three different jobs.  The two computers side by side are affectionately nicknamed the Minnesota Ripper and MQKalifornia.  I do serious work on those two computers.  The computer all by its lonesome is for any freelance work that I do.  Notice how it has the sad little beat up desk and the stupid blue folding chair.  I sure hope that isn't an actual physical representation of how my freelance work has been going.  My little 3-year-old nephew Ryan says (and I will be quoting him exactly as he talks, and his quotes will be in red while mine will be in blue), "Why do you haf tree 'puters?  Mommy has one, but its bwoken."  I know for a fact that his mom complains everyday about her broke down computer---I wish I could help her out and surprise her with a brand new computer.  She really deserves it, but I feel no guilt that I have three.  The one with the most wins.  I win!

After everything gets powered up for the day, I usually spend about a half hour or so playing with my rats...

Squeak is ready to play! 

Ryan says,

"Well, I don't know what color dey are."  (While watching

the rats eating breakfast), "I always do dat in da morning time,'cos if

it was night out, I would be going to sleep."  Makes sense to me, right?

Oh, wait, Ryan has another thought on this topic.  "Know what bed I

have?  A BUNK BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I cap this to illustrate that he

screamed this at me.  I wish having a particular type of bed made me this

happy).

While I try to prepare for my day of work, Ryan gets his toys in order for his equally busy day of playing.  However, he encounters a barrier to his ultimate goal of getting the best toys to play with.  It happens to be my enormous dog Duncan who is blind and slightly deaf.  Despite Ryan's attempts

to get Duncan to move out of the way of his toy box, Duncan is unphased and equally unmovable.

Ryan says,

"He's lazy like my dad, 'cos he never puts cans in the

 recycle."  Yup, dad is a lazy bastard.

While I work, Ryan my little nephew will pretty much stay in the living room playing.  I come out every now and then to say hello, to take a quick break, watch some cartoons with him.  Sometimes, I catch Ryan in curious and various contemplative positions.  It is always a treat to see where his 3-year-old mind has been.  Today, I find him contemplating one of his toy cars.  I'm game.  I ask him what's up. 

Ryan says,

"You don't eat cars, 'cos you'll throw up

 on your bed."  Noted.  Don't eat toy cars.

So, that is about the first two hours of my typical day.  I will post more eventually, maybe, I don't know, we'll see.  But, I'd like to leave you with this.  When you don't know what to say when you're asked, "Do you have to go to the potty," just dance around like a monkey.  It's what Ryan would do...

I've been on Buzznet sporadically as of late (sad face), as I am in a transition with regard to my job; but it's all good. 

Anywho, if you are of the persuasion to donate a toy to charity for needy children (as in a "Toys for Tots" type of program)...good on 'ya.  Even if it's just a toy or something of the like, it still may bring a wee bit of happiness to some little one that would otherwise go without. 

So with that in mind, I was made aware this evening that there are also programs that give gifts, good tidings, and visits to senior citizens who have no family and are otherwise alone during the holidays.  Perhaps, while you donate a toy, you may also look into a program in your own community that does similar for the seniors.  You may even be able to ask at area nursing homes, veterans' homes, hospitals, hospices etc., to see if you might be able to bring a bit of holiday cheer to those that may not have anyone visiting during the holiday season.  Maybe even then, you could make this something you do not just once a year but for many more times throughout the year.  I know I will.  That is all for now...

There is currently an interesting song on my music player that I have on my main page of my profile that seems strangely out of place.  The song is called "Amame Otra Vez," translated to "You'll Love Me Again."  It is a style of music called "Tejano."  A something a little different.  Whether you like it or I like or what not...the band that is performing this song are called Stampede, and I mention this because my cousin Ray is in the band and is the band's co-founder.  I'm just showing a little love right now.

(***disclaimer, I didn't write this blurb about them.  Found it online, believe it or not, but I forgot where***)

The hottest Tejano band in the Dallas-Ft Worth metroplex is STAMPEDE. This band is a six-piece outfit that is primed to make a push for the top of the Tejano market. Along with an energy level that compares to a "stampede", the bands live performances display its versatility by mixing covers with its cumbia and ranchera originals.

The band has developed a following in Texas, Michigan, Illinois and New Mexico. Fronted by lead vocalist Alex De Leon, the band moves through an array of different styles of music and is always striving to please the crowd. The band is rounded out by Gabriel Gonzales on keyboard and sax, Ray Sifuentes on accordion and back-up vocals, Jesse Sanchez on bass, Alvino Torres on lead guitar and bajo sexto and John Gonzales on drums and percussion. The drive and will displayed by these six young men shows in every move that is made. Whether it be on stage or on paper, STAMPEDE strives for a professional attitude, but also has fun at the same time.

My cousin is the guy in the back wearing the black cowboy hat. 

***My little claim to fame until I get to direct my own movie that I wrote and that I'll put myself in and score the music (so, it could be awhile)***