LeaV

Listen up people!  All the other countries are laughing at us.  We are the “laughing stock” of the world, and it seriously is beginning to really piss me off.  I’m not a nationalist extremist or anything like that; and I’m not a xenophobic asshole that’s about to hurl insults because of an unfounded contempt.  So, here’s what I’m talking about.  Complete and total academic failure in the United States.  Based on the Department of Education statistics from 2006, we are a nation of dullards compared to the rest of the world, and it’s completely embarrassing.  I want to put on a nice face for the rest of the world.  I want to welcome them and show them we are not all about Britney and Lindsay and noxious reality TV; but, creepy Uncle Carl came over with his backassward kids and completely blew our impression to the rest of the world.  Don’t believe me?  Follow this link, http://4brevard.com/choice/international-test-scores.htm, and be prepared to read and weep for our nation’s young people---if you care.  Essentially, students in fourth grade, middle school, and high school are tested in math and science and scored and compared to scores from other countries.  As Pascal D. Forgione, Jr., Ph.D., U.S. Commissioner of Education Statistics, comments in this article (follow the link), math and science are used, because it is the only common basis with which to compare students from a multitude of different countries.  And guess what?  We have failed miserably.  Comparatively, we rank poor with regard to our fourth graders, worse with our middle school students, and are unable to even compete with our high school students.  You know what I found funny but yet so sad in this article?  This comment, “The world’s greatest concentration of Ph.D’s are in Seoul, South Korea, and half of Americans can’t even find Seoul on a map.”

Can you find it?  I really didn’t want to believe this and the implications that these statistics have on the welfare and future of the young people of the United States.  However, even in the small microcosm of the Internet that is Buzznet, I have seriously begun to start losing hope.  For example, I innocently went to read an article posted here on Buzznet regarding a Fox affiliate news piece on “emo.”  I was curious.  I was looking for a candy floss diversion.  However, feast your eyes on the comments that ensued…

“fucktards”

“Fox is sooo stupid”

“that was gay”

“the people of Fox are a bunch of squares who know nothing”

“this is so gay”

“Fox is like the gayest of gay news reports”

Okay, the outrage ensued regarding this news affiliate reporting on emo music, lifestyle, whatever.  Who cares. Essentially, these young people were offended about the overgeneralization this news report seemed to convey regarding this music and lifestyle.  So, instead of pointing that out in a sensible and intelligent manner, the quotes come in regarding all of Fox news being “gay” and “stupid” and “fucktards.”  Yup, no overgeneralizations there.  Additionally, none of these kids seemed to realize that this was NOT a piece done by Fox News.  This was done by a Fox affiliate.  Just like CBS and NBC and the CW have affiliate stations in different parts of the US, Fox is also a television channel with affiliate stations, and this news piece had nothing to do with Fox News proper.  So, this quote, “Fox News is fucking stupid.  Seriously, when will they start reporting things that matter like what’s going on in Iraq, what’s happening to the US economy.”  Almost there young one, but if you bothered to even watch Fox News, you would find out with your own two eyes and ears that Fox News does nothing but report on these issues, continually. 

Additionally, these gems of wisdom from our nation’s youth.

“adults should stay out of teen culture”

“what is it with adults these days saying every band out there is emo.  Why is everything that isn’t rap or country emo.  Adults will do anything to alienate the kids that aren’t what they consider normal.”

“I can’t believe that the ‘adults’ are trying to understand us teenagers.  I mean why would you want to? Do they want to be like us?”

“Why do adults try and understand. It ends up being really pathetic”

“Aren’t we taught generalizations are bad?  Hypocrites.”

Okay, you want adults out of your business and get a bit upset when adults try to “understand” you, yet I’ve heard many a youngster whine about not being understood (and I don't think this is anything new to this generation).  Additionally, if you want adults out of teen culture, stop idol worshiping adults that are making up your teen culture.  From my understanding, the one adult whom you all seem to think understands you the best is Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance, and he’s far from being a teen (as a matter of fact, I believe I’m only a year older than Mr. Way).  And, yes, generalizations are bad.  So, stop overgeneralizing that adults say that every band is emo, or that all adults are trying to infiltrate teen culture, or that adults want to be like you.  Adults who give a crap about you and your future will try to understand you because lack of understanding and not wanting to understand what’s going on with you equates to not giving a shit about you.  It’s not pathetic…it’s called caring.

Again to a different subject…the original pink one himself…

See, lots of kids here on Buzznet seem to get a kick out of him.  I’m not going to judge him here.  It’s just not worth my time, but you see the sage advice he gives when someone questions some picture or video he posts. 

And, if someone disagrees with him and states a half-hearted rambling on how they disagree with him, you get replies like “cry me a fucking river.”  See, the video in question was a bit racist, and this person was offended being that they are a person of color.  However, instead of taking this person’s feelings into account and putting forth an intelligent retort, this person gets this comment.  Yeah, cry me a fucking river, racist stereotyping is just a joke.

I could go on and on,but I'm not about criticizing and tearing people apart, especially young people.  It not only goes against my nature, it contradicts the career I just left (which still saddens me).  I'm also not going to end this rant on a negative note.  I still cling to a tiny bit of hope that we can start turning things around.  We can start believing in the educational system and throwing our support behind giving our young people good examples to follow and a sound educational background to allow them to have a bright and successful future.  It doesn't have to be only here on Buzznet, it can be in steering kids toward emulating people such as Neil deGrasse Tyson (I love this guy), Lisa Randall (she used quotes from Bjork and what

not in her book, Warped Passages: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Universe's Hidden Dimensions), Condoleezza Rice, or even Tony Dungy (I adore him as well).

And, everything doesn't have to be so serious.  Remember that it's okay to love music, television, movies, celebrities, rock stars.  Hell, I even love cartoons.  It's okay to have a diversion and to let your mind wander and have fun; but, remember your priorities kids.  This is YOUR future.  Do something about it.  Let's show the world that we're more than just train wreck celebrities, stubborn presidents, and overfed idiots.

So, I've been watching Dr. Drew's Celebrity Rehab.  I watch because (a) I'm a grown-ass woman, and I can do whatever the hell I want, and (b) I like Dr. Drew.  I listened to him every night on my loooong drive home from work (way back in the day) when he did that radio show with Adam Carolla called "Loveline." 

I haven't read what TWOP has said about this show, although my curiosity is killing me (by the way, TWOP is "Television Without Pity"...visit their site, they blog on television shows, reality, cartoons, you name it, have a read, you won't regret it if you have a sense of humor).  I haven't heard what people (i.e., my friends) have thought of this newest celebreality TV crap either, although I know they'd tell me it was stupid, and I need to get out more, and if I burn out one more cable box from watching so much TV, the cable company isn't going to replace another one, blah, blah).  I watched mainly because we all have to admit that we have this sick and twisted desire to watch horrible things happen to other people, especially train wreck celebrities trying to get through rehab and what not.  Admit it...you like to hear about stars screwing up their lives (makes our lives not seem so bad after all---I mean, that's me anyway).  If we didn't, explain how we all know about what's going on at every minute in Britney Spears' life.  Huh?  Explain that.

The other reason I wanted to watch this was because I've been in rehab...uh, four times, and I'm done with it; but not in an Amy Winehouse done with it (I said, "No, no, no") but in a I've been sober and clean for close to five years done with it. I'm not saying this to garner sympathy or a pat on the back because I made it through alive...just to make an observation.  I was watching this show on A&E called "Intervention."  Yeah, it was gritty and intense and way too fargin' depressing.  I mean, I don't live with the misconception that everything has to have a happy ending, but throw me a bone every once in awhile.  I know addictions are bleak, and tough, and brutal; but I want hope as well, or else, what's the point of the show (side note...there are happy endings.  People do conquer and survive and thrive).  I watched one where the subject of that week's intervention happened to be the son of one of the members of a band from back in the 1970s called "Three Dog Night" (you know, "Joy to the World," "Just An Old Fashioned Love Song").  Ugh, I thought I'd kill myself after watching that.  It didn't end on much of a high note.  So, this show started bringing up too many unpleasant memories for me, and I don't watch much anymore.  Then, I saw the advert for Dr. Drew's new show....

I haven't really seen many reality-based shows on TV relating to people going through rehab.  First of all, I know that being in rehab is a confidentiality issue---so, it might be hard to get clearance to film people going through treatment.  Secondly, maybe I just wasn't paying attention.  Anyway, I wanted to watch this show, because I was curious about what it was like for celebrities to be in rehab.  Did it differ much from us common folk?  Was it rehab like Lindsey Lohan rehab?  You know, an afternoon here and there, quick jaunt to Vegas to party, back to rehab, ankle bracelet at the club, back to rehab, a little shopping, back to rehab, tah-dah cured?  Or, was it rehab like I knew rehab...detoxing, getting your lazy, addicted ass out of bed after you've detoxed, going to group, doing some physical activity, more group, doing a one-on-one, apologizing, more group, more apologizing.  If you're lucky...a social outing with your counselors but not to Vegas or a nightclub---maybe to bowl, or go for a walk, or to a grocery store.  Yup, pretty glamorous. 

I've watched the first two shows, and surprisingly, the rehab these pseudo-celebrities are going through was, dare I say it, pretty much like the rehab I've been through, sort of.  I mean, I know it's not exactly the same, but there are some similarities (which there should be and no Palm Springs, Copa Cabana rehab **cough, cough, Promises** if these celebs are serious about getting clean).  Most surprising to me, however, was that it doesn't matter who you are or where you are or what you do---you always seem to find the same characters in rehab.  Let me explain...

1.  The "Jeff Conaways" of rehab.  I've met far too many of these people during my stints in treatment.  These people are so messed up and so far gone that they've reached the point where very likely soon, their addictions will (not maybe) kill them, and they are getting very, very close to the end of the line.  If they don't tow the line now, they won't make it back after another relapse.  If you've seen the show, you know what I'm talking about.  If you haven't seen the show, Jeff Conway was (? is) an actor whose most famous roles were on the television show "Taxi" and in the movie "Grease."  He is so messed up on drugs and what not at this point, that he's pretty much wheelchair bound, has drug-induced seizures (either from the drugs or from detoxing), is suicidal, and just such a pathetic mess.  One minute you think they're with you, the next minute mumbling incoherent, shaking, crying, screaming.  These people terrified while I went through treatment, meaning I'd think I was never going to get to that point; I knew when too much alcohol or drugs was just too much, and I could control my use unlike that guy or girl.  Yeah, you see how absolutely ridiculous that sounds.  Like someone in AA once told me, "One is too many and One Hundred is not enough."   

2.  The "Mary Careys" of rehab.  Yup, met these people, too.  Oh, goodness no, I was not one of them.  Basically, decent girls, and one of my best friends was a Mary Carey of rehab; but, these are the addicted messes that come into rehab and basically try to get it on with anyone in treatment, essentially replacing one addiction (drugs) with another (sex).  It doesn't work out, by the way.  Oh, and don't think this applies just to the girls---it's the guys, too.  My friend got involved with some guy in rehab, and she had this thought in her head that this would be different, because he was getting clean, and they could get clean together.  She was just so desperate to replace her addiction to drugs and alcohol, that she gravitated toward the only other addiction she could while in treatment that wouldn't get her in trouble with her probation officer--guys.  Poor girl.  She got out of treatment as did "Mr. Fucking Wonderful," and they went on to support and encourage their eventual relapses with him disappearing off into the sunset (probably to jail or whatever) and her back to square one, but this time jail first (for possession), and then court-ordered rehab, piss tests, home monitoring.  Yeah, real fun and all for a different fix---a bad relationship with that guy or girl...like I said, I've seen it work both ways.  I lost touch with this girl.  Sadly, I thought (and still do) it should stay that way. 

3.  The "Daniel Baldwins" of rehab.  Ugh, the absolute worst people to deal with in rehab.  The know-it-all assholes who walk the walk and talk the talk.  You see, these are the people that are going to relapse---BIG TIME.  They sit in group, and they lecture others about overcoming their addictions and trying to live a better life and going it one day at a time, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseum.  They piss and moan about how "this" or "that" in treatment is not conducive to their ability to conquer their addiction and maintain their sobriety.  You know why I despise these people the most?  Because, this was me.  I did this three times before I finally got it through my thick skull to just shut my mouth and listen and work on being clean instead of working on how I could manipulate everyone I encountered so that I could continue using.  See, then I'd have an excuse for why I relapsed.  Oh, it wasn't me...I had no control over the events in my life that led to my relapse.  I was exposed to all of these detrimental things while I was in treatment that led to my eventual using again.  Bullshit.  Absolute pure bullshit.  Plus, I talked the "rehab" talk so I could convince the counselors that I was on "the road to recovery," but it was only so I could get a day pass (so I could go out and use) or to get out of treatment faster (so I could go out and use).  My prediction for this show is that Daniel Baldwin will definitely go out and use again.  Watch his behavior on the show and see my comment about these types of characters in treatment.  I'm not saying that he will or not and I don't know if he has or not...I'm just basing this on what I've seen, and my observations could be very naive. 

So, the other thing I've noticed after watching this show is how prevalent it is nowadays for young celebs (or any celebrity) to have addictions and to almost flaunt this and their subsequent entry into treatment (like by having paparazzi around or to do a reality show) to the general public.  I mean, I don't get it.  It's taken me close to six years to admit I had a drug problem back in the day.  I was embarrassed about it and ashamed.  I felt like a failure for the longest time, because I couldn't even succeed at just living life...I needed drugs and alcohol to get by.  Thankfully, I'm still very young and have lived without these crutches for several years and can now live many more years clean and sober and happy with that or at least complacent with that.  Hmmm, I guess I see it as a good thing and a bad thing with these celebrities.  For one, I think it's good that people come out in the open (even celebrities) and say, "Hey, I've got a problem, and I'm going to get help for it."  Maybe, it will encourage regular folks like you and I to follow suit.  It opens up dialogs and takes the stigma off of admitting you're an alcoholic or a coke addict and what not.  I wasn't a wino lying in the gutter. I was an educated, nice kid that had a horrendous problem that I was desperate to get help for, because I was tired of living the way I was.  On the other hand, I see this as a bad thing because, geez, I don't know. No one seems sincere.  Do you become more edgy and cool with your addictions?  Are you trying to make yourself more interesting?  Or, are you trying to externalize every poor decision you make by blaming it on "your addiction?"  This way, you don't have to take responsibility for driving drunk, or shaving your head, or showing your lady parts to photographers as you get out of a car ("Oops, forgot my underpants again.  I was so drunk that day.") 

Okay, so I don't know what I think yet.  My thoughts are a little random and scattered as this journal entry so vividly illustrates; but I do know this:  I will be moving to Los Angeles in the next two years (maybe, I'll explain later); and as long as I'm out there, I'd like to give a shot at opening up my own treatment facility for all addictions (drugs, alcohol, popularity, being a dumb ass, buzzes...you name it) which will welcome not only celebrities but non-celebrities as well.  In an upcoming journal entry...I will tell you all about my grand plan...

Again, I've gone on way too long...see, I'm addicted to words now...

How's everyone's New Year been going?  Getting off to a nice start?  The caucuses have been exciting and fun, no?  If you are American and are still wondering how you match up against the current candidates views on everything from the Iraq war to global warming...try this fun little quiz.  Granted, it was from USA Today (no offense), but it was interesting.  A few things surprised me with regard to my top three matches...

http://www.usatoday.com/news/politics/election2008/candidate-match-game.htm

Anyway, I've been away because of this...

Yes, doing my civic duty and taking care of my turn as an American at jury duty.  No time for fun, no time for writing, no time, no time, no time.  Plenty of time, however, to watch every television piece on the Iowa and New Hampshire caucuses.  I've got lots to say, maybe I'll journal later.  Yes, I probably will.  As I've said before, I love politics (hate if you must...that's okay), and this is really an exciting time for politics.  It's like we're wiping the slate clean and, hopefully, starting anew after eight years with the Bush administration.  I'm hopeful, I hope.

Later...

I’ll Be back Soon!